Enjoy this comedy interview. Could you just do me a favor and enjoy all of the comedy interviews that I do? I would really appreciate it. I don’t do this for you to hate it. Wouldn’t that be a weird interview series? Hey, nice people who take the time to answer these questions, I just need you to know that I am doing this so that the readers hate it. Not only will they hate me, but they will hate you because you are part of it. That is not going to happen! I’m only going to interview people who are enjoyable. You know who is enjoyable? This guy…Charlie Kasov!
Riggs: How are you?
Kasov: I’m good. It’s my birthday and I just ate a hot dog.
Riggs: Corn, Canned or Fresh?
Kasov: Fresh corn. You can scrape it off the cob with a knife and douse it in butter if you want that canned corn taste but without the metallic canny aftertaste.
Riggs: What is the thing (tv show, comedian, person etc.) that gave you the idea to start comedy?
Kasov: After reading the unabridged volumes of Darwin’s “Origin of the Species” in kindergarten, I realized that jokes would help me secure a more favorable mate than would athletics, at which I was a meager performer at best.
Riggs: If you could have dinner with any historical figure, what would you suggest as an appetizer?
Kasov: Buffalo wings, but the super-spicy kind with a nickname like “suicidal” or “chernobyl” that some bar created as a last-ditch effort to attract tourism. It’d be fun to see Abe Lincoln take down a dozen of those.
Riggs: How many surgeries have you had?
Kasov: I just had a cardioversion on Monday, where they zap your heart back to a regular heartbeat. And stitches on my eyebrow after I hit a car with an aluminum baseball bat and it bounced back into my face.
Riggs: What are your four favorite state capitals (lower 48)? Please don’t say why.
Kasov: Carson City. Lansing. Montpelier. Carson City.
Riggs: 5 words or less…explain religion.
Kasov: Fingers crossed No wammy!
Riggs: What are you most proud of in the world?
Kasov: That’s a tough one. My brother just gave me a full size portrait of Vigo from Ghostbusters 2. That’s definitely up there.
Riggs: Any final thoughts? (Although none of your words will be edited, do know that if you do not include nice words about me, I will add them in for you…fyi, my version of you will be very complimentary of me)
Kasov: The trucker hat that this potato salad kickstarter kid is giving away to backers is going to be super uncool in 8 months and ridiculously cool again in 8 years.