Preacher Recap: Damsels
We begin with seeing Arseface’s genesis.
Tracy (the young woman in the vegetative state from season one) calls him to cry over how her boyfriend cheated on her and she’s going to kill herself. A lot of overly cheerful pablum unfolds, and while Tracy decides not to kill herself at first after Eugene finishes his speech with a Mary Poppins quote (I shit you not) after he tries to kiss her, she decides maybe blowing her brains out with the shotgun was the right idea. Eugene lunges at her at just the right (wrong?) moment, and the blast only takes off parts of her head and brains.
She actually blinks.
Eugene spends the next minute or two trying to shovel her brains back into her head. Because God loves an idiot, Tracy’s mom comes home and tries to get into the bedroom.
He tries to get out the window, but it won’t open enough to get away. Desperate, he tries to take his own head off, but the shotgun misfires…or so he thought. Looking down at the barrel, it goes off. The birth of Arseface.
…and then it all happens again? Ok. We’re seeing Eugene’s entry into Hell. Eugene’s Hell is where a girl would rather die than kiss him.
So, after he’s done reliving it tons of times, he looks like he’s entering Hell proper, and it’s a prison.
“Your loss, dipshit.”
Our three are on their way to New Orleans, listening to a CD of lesser known jazz works, listening to what the jazz band said was God’s favorite tune over and over again. As Tulip says: “It sounds like two cats screwin’…at the airport…under an ice cream truck.”
She really doesn’t want to go to New Orleans. Wonder why? Could it be because of what happened at the Mumbai Sky Tower?
Also, Jesse doesn’t like the swamp. A ‘family thing’.
When they get to New Orleans, they roll into the first jazz club they find, and ask the bartender for God….and his response is “All three of you?” Why do I have a bad feeling about this…
“All three of you?”
After a series of gatekeepers and a trail that leads into another building, they find…a little old man in a polo shirt, who motions them to be quiet. He draws back a curtain to reveal a man and a woman seated on a couch, and the man is dressed head to toe like a dalmatian. A selection of sex toys are offered, as well as a price for watching and a price for participating. Yeah, that was about the level of weirdness I expected.
After that, Tulip spots someone in the crowd, and claims she doesn’t feel well. Cas says he’ll go with Tulip, because she doesn’t know where the guy they’re staying with lives–apparently it’s a friend of his. He tells Jesse he’ll love him.
Jesse wanders off to find God, finds a drink instead, with a heaping side of ridicule.
Cas tries to convince Tulip to tell him what’s going on.
“We’re on a really big mission.”
Cas’ friend isn’t too happy to see him, but lets them stay.
At the last bar Jesse stops at, he gets a tip. They tell him to talk to a singer at a nearby bar.
Here’s where it gets weird. (I know, right?)
She throws a drink on him and says clean himself up and meet her outside. He looks out the bathroom window just in time to see her get in a taxi. He runs out to the street, and a white van has hit the taxi, and men in white suits and white balaclavas jump out and grab her. Jesse uses Genesis to get them to stop the van, and guys pour out of the van hellbent on kicking his ass. Instead, Jesse takes them on hero-style, beating the crop out of each one and saving the girl.
He goes back to her place, and while she packs a bag to run, she tells him the story of a guy who tells her about God being missing and the white clad men chasing him. Then the guy turned up dead. He sees her off in another taxi.
I wonder how long it’ll take The Saint to show up this time.
“Go find your God, preacher.”
Arseface makes it onto the cellblock in Hell. First person he meets is Hitler.
Turns out, the pretty blond jazz singer Jesse saved was too good to be true–she’s one of the white suits. She advises that Jesse definitely has something (Genesis), and to kick him up to ‘Samson Unit’.
Jesse goes to another jazz club and requests God’s favorite song. Talking to someone, he figures out the piece is about Armageddon.
Tulip goes out for smokes, and the people she’s afraid of show up.
Previous Episode: Mumbai Sky Tower
JL Jamieson is a strange book nerd who writes technical documents by day, and book news, reviews, and other assorted opinions for you by night. She is working on her own fiction, and spends time making jewelry to sell at local conventions, as well as stalking the social media accounts of all your favorite writers.